glumshoe:

glumshoe:

succinctlysevered:

glumshoe:

glumshoe:

the first person to fall asleep at my party gets tucked in and given some water in case they’re thirsty later

also toast and/or eggs in the morning, because I love you, you sleepy bastard

what about the last person. what do they get.

the last person is me and I get the peace of mind of knowing that my friends are as comfortable and safe as I can make them

also, their credit cards

kuunakullanvalkeana:

straights girls: hahahha man candles, man soap, isn’t that stupid
straight girls: look at these boyfriend jeans i just bought to go with my boyfriend shirt 🙂

straight girls: masculinity is sooooo fragile
straight girls: whoa it’s actually homophobic to associate short hair and flannels with lesbians. for example, i have a pixie cut and i’m straight.

straight girls: at least we women don’t do the no homo
straight girls: you know it’s called a girl crush bc it’s not a real crush because it’s on a girl